Oscar Zone Vol. II; Part VI: Live Results!

Hello all those in the wonderful Internet World. Tonight Norwegian Morning Wood decided to do something very special and post some Live Oscar Results and Reactions from my own predictions. We've got about a half-hour until the Ceremony kicks off now so stay tuned for in-depth coverage like you've never read on the Internet before!

So just like last year I'll list my predictions and highlight the actual winner in GREEN. If you recall, I had highlighted in BLUE are the nominees that WOULD WIN. In RED are the noms that SHOULD HAVE WON. PURPLE means I thought the would-be winner was actually deserving.

Best Achievement in Art Direction

Alice in Wonderland (2010): Robert Stromberg, Karen O'Hara

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 (2010): Stuart Craig, Stephenie McMillan

Inception (2010): Guy Hendrix Dyas, Larry Dias, Douglas A. Mowat

The King's Speech (2010): Eve Stewart, Judy Farr

True Grit (2010): Jess Gonchor, Nancy Haigh

Now we get to say Academy Award Winning Film, Alice in Wonderland. This actually went almost as I expected but I thought the Harry Potter blockbuster might have nabbed it instead of the Disney blockbuster. Still waiting to see if the Harry Potter films are ever recognised. Alice in Wonderland is a really fantasmic film that does look nice, tho its content was shit. At this point I'm not worried about The King's Speech, it can still sweep a good amount.

Best Achievement in Cinematography

Black Swan (2010): Matthew Libatique

Inception (2010): Wally Pfister

The King's Speech (2010): Danny Cohen
The Social Network (2010): Jeff Cronenweth
True Grit (2010): Roger Deakins

Wally! I'm very excited, he deserved this one. Many pundits were singing True Grit here now I'm glad I called Inception instead of looking like a moron if they had lost. Still holding out that they could have a big night.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role

Amy Adams for The Fighter (2010)
Helena Bonham Carter for The King's Speech (2010)

Melissa Leo for The Fighter (2010)

Hailee Steinfeld for True Grit (2010)

Jacki Weaver for Animal Kingdom (2010)

Kirk Douglas hitting on Anne Hathaway, wow. What is happening with this guy? Spartacus! Did the Oscar people figure James and Anne wouldn't hold the crowd so they counted on this 94-year old man's ramblings to be a highlight of the night? But as the award goes, this was an interesting category but Melissa's had an edge for the past few weeks, no major surprise here. She does look a lot better than her character and is a lot nicer, too. Nice work, Mel.

Best Short Film, Animated

Day & Night (2010): Teddy Newton

The Gruffalo (2009) (TV): Jakob Schuh, Max Lang
Let's Pollute (2009): Geefwee Boedoe
The Lost Thing (2010): Shaun Tan, Andrew Ruhemann
Madagascar, a Journey Diary (2010): Bastien Dubois

I love the jokes that just fall flat. I actually did really enjoy Day & Night and thought it was a very cool little piece of animation but as long as The Gruffalo didn't win I'm excited. That was terrible and leading some polls prior to the night. How does anyone accurately predict categories like this?

Best Animated Feature Film of the Year

How to Train Your Dragon (2010): Dean DeBlois, Chris Sanders
The Illusionist (2010): Sylvain Chomet

Toy Story 3 (2010): Lee Unkrich

Seeing a hand drawn good film in this category was pretty cool but this was a no brainer. There's still the idea that this was the only Animated Film nominated for Best Picture...so surely it's already the Best Animated Film? I'm getting bitter over Pixar, we need more Simpsons episodes to bring them down.

Best Writing, Screenplay Based on Material Previously Produced or Published

127 Hours (2010): Danny Boyle, Simon Beaufoy

The Social Network (2010): Aaron Sorkin

Toy Story 3 (2010): Michael Arndt, John Lasseter, Andrew Stanton, Lee Unkrich
True Grit (2010): Joel Coen, Ethan Coen
Winter's Bone (2010): Debra Granik, Anne Rosellini

I liked it better when they read excerpts from the screenplays instead of just showing the usual spread of clips. That tended to highlight screenplays' importance distinct from the visual aspects of movie making. Anyway, Sorkin was another no brainer here, there was no way he wasn't going to win regardless of any politics, this was the best screenplay anybody has written in years.

Best Writing, Screenplay Written Directly for the Screen

Another Year (2010): Mike Leigh
The Fighter (2010): Scott Silver, Paul Tamasy, Eric Johnson, Keith Dorrington

Inception (2010): Christopher Nolan

The Kids Are All Right (2010): Lisa Cholodenko, Stuart Blumberg

The King's Speech (2010): David Seidler

This is more of what I was looking for, showing the lines and beats to demonstrate as best they can the effect of screenwriting. Actually you can really tell what some of the actors (Colin Firth) especially do with these lines. As The King's Speech was picking up steam the past few weeks I could have called this one and switched my pick but I didn't. Because I owe you guys that much integrity. Right. This is a better sign for The King's Speech's chances later in the evening, but since its main Best Picture dual is with The Social Network it's tough to tell from the two film's ownage of these categories alone.

Best Foreign Language Film of the Year

Biutiful (2010): Alejandro González Iñárritu (Mexico)

Dogtooth (2009): Giorgos Lanthimos (Greece)

In a Better World (2010): Susanne Bier (Denmark)
Incendies (2010): Denis Villeneuve (Canada)
Outside the Law (2010): Rachid Bouchareb (Algeria)

This one was also tracking pretty well the past few weeks tho I'm surprised it beat some more high profile films here. Then again, when Biutiful is the highest profile film in your category it's basically up for grabs. I really love calling these tough categories that are full of shit no one's ever seen intelligently. That has not gone well so far.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role

Christian Bale for The Fighter (2010)

John Hawkes for Winter's Bone (2010)
Jeremy Renner for The Town (2010)
Mark Ruffalo for The Kids Are All Right (2010)
Geoffrey Rush for The King's Speech (2010)

No shit. Moving on. Can we say that Boston is the new New York for gritty crime dramas and outrageous accents? I'm diggin it. Nice beard, Chris, still jobless?

Best Achievement in Music Written for Motion Pictures, Original Score

127 Hours (2010): A.R. Rahman
How to Train Your Dragon (2010): John Powell

Inception (2010): Hans Zimmer

The King's Speech (2010): Alexandre Desplat

The Social Network (2010): Trent Reznor, Atticus Ross

NIN has an Academy Award! This was a pretty easy guess tho Hans may have brought some good competition. Ultimately however they don't give out Oscars for BRRRMMMM. Trent and Att nailed this though with a score that worked perfectly throughout the film.

Best Achievement in Sound Mixing

Inception (2010): Lora Hirschberg, Gary Rizzo, Ed Novick
The King's Speech (2010): Paul amblin, Martin Jensen, John Midgley
Salt (2010): Jeffrey J. Haboush, William Sarokin, Scott Millan, Greg P. Russell

The Social Network (2010): Ren Klyce, David Parker, Michael Semanick, Mark Weingarten

True Grit (2010): Skip Lievsay, Craig Berkey, Greg Orloff, Peter F. Kurland

Inception was getting some momentum going into this and looked like a sure fire win recently. I called The Social Network a month ago, but instead it's looking like its cleaning up a lot of the technical awards and deservedly so.

Best Achievement in Sound Editing

Inception (2010): Richard King

Toy Story 3 (2010): Tom Myers, Michael Silvers

TRON: Legacy (2010): Gwendolyn Yates Whittle, Addison Teague

True Grit (2010): Skip Lievsay, Craig Berkey
Unstoppable (2010): Mark P. Stoeckinger

Yep. Sweeping the Sound Awards is Inception, no big surprise here. Jeez they blew through those categories fast. How come no one gives a shit about Sound but will sit and wait fifteen minutes for all the actors? Collaborative my ass. I swear I'm not out of line here...

Best Achievement in Makeup

Barney's Version (2010): Adrien Morot

The Way Back (2010): Edouard F. Henriques, Greg Funk, Yolanda Toussieng
The Wolfman (2010): Rick Baker, Dave Elsey

The Wolfman was looking pretty good down the stretch for a while there and I probably should have called that. Despite the crappiness of that film Rick is an accomplished Makeup Artist and definitely deserves to be up there.

Best Achievement in Costume Design

Alice in Wonderland (2010): Colleen Atwood

I Am Love (2009): Antonella Cannarozzi

The King's Speech (2010): Jenny Beavan

The Tempest (2010/II): Sandy Powell

True Grit (2010): Mary Zophres

I genuinely did not see this one coming tho if I recall it was gaining some speed going into the night. This is almost similar to last year, if I had done my research I'd know that Atwood is no stranger to the Academy and had this coming for a while.

Best Documentary, Short Subjects

Killing in the Name (2010): Nominees TBD

Poster Girl (2010): Nominees TBD
Strangers No More (2010): Karen Goodman, Kirk Simon
Sun Come Up (2010): Jennifer Redfearn, Tim Metzger
The Warriors of Qiugang (2010): Ruby Yang, Thomas Lennon

I'll get those Nominees name down pretty soon I swear. Jake nailed the only reason to see these - to better help your Oscar Predictions. This is probably one of the trickiest categories to call, I really tossed up a one in five chance on this one.

Best Short Film, Live Action

The Confession (2010/IV): Tanel Toom

The Crush (2009): Michael Creagh

God of Love (2010): Luke Matheny

Na Wewe (2010): Ivan Goldschmidt
Wish 143 (2009): Ian Barnes, Samantha Waite

I love how they always say that big directors got their start in shorts. Who's the last fucking mainstream director to get his or her start in Short Subjects? Who knows, but I actually called this, these shorts should count double.

Best Documentary, Features

Exit Through the Gift Shop (2010): Banksy, Jaimie D'Cruz

GasLand (2010): Josh Fox, Trish Adlesic

Inside Job (2010): Charles Ferguson, Audrey Marrs

Restrepo (2010): Tim Hetherington, Sebastian Junger
Waste Land (2010): Lucy Walker, Angus Aynsley

Is it just me or does James Franco just seem high all the time? I was really hoping for a Banksy win here but Inside Job was the much safer bet for the Academy. Damn I really wanted to see an outrageous Banksy moment. At least this dude has a good message. He should team up with The Other Guys (2010).

Best Achievement in Visual Effects

Alice in Wonderland (2010): Ken Ralston, David Schaub, Carey Villegas, Sean Phillips
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 (2010): Tim Burke, John Richardson, Christian Manz, Nicolas Aithadi
Hereafter (2010): Michael Owens, Bryan Grill, Stephan Trojansky, Joe Farrell

Inception (2010): Chris Corbould, Andrew Lockley, Pete Bebb, Paul J. Franklin

Iron Man 2 (2010): Janek Sirrs, Ben Snow, Ged Wright, Daniel Sudick

Jeez Jude he's right there! Haha you need to bring Downey down, he's so levelheaded now that he can take it pretty well. At least it's better than ripping on Hugh Jackman. Seriously, what the hell was Hugh Jackman even in this year? He's sitting in the front row, why, just because he's a former host? Whatevs - Inception's win here is very cool, I'm glad they awarded a film that utilised mostly practical effects including that spinning hotel which is a true achievement. Again, nothing is stopping Inception from rolling through tons of technical awards.

Best Achievement in Editing

127 Hours (2010): Jon Harris
Black Swan (2010): Andrew Weisblum
The Fighter (2010): Pamela Martin
The King's Speech (2010): Tariq Anwar

The Social Network (2010): Kirk Baxter, Angus Wall

I'm glad they played the clip of the rowing scene, that was the film's strongest selling point on how good the editing was. This is also no surprise, the win here is well deserved. I'm beginning to doubt The King's chances at Best Pic by this point.

Best Achievement in Music Written for Motion Pictures, Original Song

127 Hours (2010): A.R. Rahman, Rollo Armstrong, Dido ("If I Rise")
Country Strong (2010): Tom Douglas, Hillary Lindsey, Troy Verges ("Coming Home")

Tangled (2010): Alan Menken, Glenn Slater ("I See the Light")

Toy Story 3 (2010): Randy Newman ("We Belong Together")

Actually I hate Randy Newman. And what, they couldn't get Dido? That Florence chick's stock is rising fast lately after a Grammy performance as well. She just needs to fix her bangs, shit. I'm also curious how Jennifer Hudson's boobs are staying in her dress right now. I was actually reading that "If I Rise" was on track for an upset. I call shenanigans on that, sir. Actually I like Randy's complaints about the number of nominees here. Why not just throw in a throwaway fifth song? I'm thinking something from AC/DC: Iron Man 2 perhaps?

Best Achievement in Directing

Darren Aronofsky for Black Swan (2010)
Ethan Coen, Joel Coen for True Grit (2010)

David Fincher for The Social Network (2010

Tom Hooper for The King's Speech (2010)
David O. Russell for The Fighter (2010)

Whoa! Maybe The King's Speech will roll through for a Best Picture after all! It'll get down to it, which is very exciting. This was actually a difficult category to guess, the DGA typically matches up very well with the Oscars but after the BAFTAs didn't award Tom I didn't really think he stood a chance. Good for him though, it's not a totally outrageous win. Although Darren's mustache is growing in nicely.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role

Annette Bening for The Kids Are All Right (2010)
Nicole Kidman for Rabbit Hole (2010)
Jennifer Lawrence for Winter's Bone (2010)

Natalie Portman for Black Swan (2010)

Michelle Williams for Blue Valentine (2010)

Wow, what an upset. Totally didn't see that one. Let's move on.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role

Javier Bardem for Biutiful (2010)
Jeff Bridges for True Grit (2010)
Jesse Eisenberg for The Social Network (2010)

Colin Firth for The King's Speech (2010)

James Franco for 127 Hours (2010)

This was again not a big surprise. Colin may well be on his way to becoming one of Hollywood's premier actors. Love that British sensibility.

Best Motion Picture of the Year

127 Hours (2010): Christian Colson, Danny Boyle, John Smithson
Black Swan (2010): Mike Medavoy, Brian Oliver, Scott Franklin
The Fighter (2010): David Hoberman, Todd Lieberman, Mark Wahlberg
Inception (2010): Christopher Nolan, Emma Thomas
The Kids Are All Right (2010): Gary Gilbert, Jeffrey Levy-Hinte, Celine Rattray

The King's Speech (2010): Iain Canning, Emile Sherman, Gareth Unwin

The Social Network (2010): Scott Rudin, Dana Brunetti, Michael De Luca, Ceán Chaffin

Toy Story 3 (2010): Darla K. Anderson
True Grit (2010): Ethan Coen, Joel Coen, Scott Rudin
Winter's Bone (2010): Anne Rosellini, Alix Madigan

That montage was fantastically well-done. I don't even mind seeing the ends of each Best Film of the Year. If you've been paying attention to NMW you'll remember that I did switch my pick this Friday, but again, I'll take the hit here from my Original Predictions. Both The King's Speech and The Social Network ended up splitting a bunch of the categories, which made for a pretty entertaining evening. James and Anne - nice work after a bit of a shaky start, way to liven it up a bit. Kirk Douglas, Hugh Jackman, what the hell?  Whats up with these kids? Yeesh. Anyway, nice night. I'm not doing this live stuff again. So my final count is 14/24. Not great. Nice job Melissa for dropping the first F-Bomb in Oscar History.

Lastly I'll give a shout-out to that girl from Buffalo I met last night - if you're out there reading this...I forgot your name and I'm sorry. Let's get in touch somehow.

Oscar Zone Vol. II; Part V: Best Picture!

Well here we are, folks. The Academy Award Ceremony is in two days and we've got one more major category to go over. The ballots were due on Tuesday and by now the winners are already in their envelopes and about to be immortalised in Oscar Lore Forever. You can read some more about the whole process of Oscar Week here. But now we'll discuss the most prestigious award of the evening and it's one that for now is up for grabs - Best Picture. Let's take a gander at everyone's chances:

Winter's Bone (2010): Anne Rosellini, Alix Madigan

It's a shame that Wayne and Garth don't pick the Oscars. That's about the only world in which this flick could possibly win. Actually I'm sure that sketch has more of an impact on Pop Culture than Winter's Bone, mostly because the most anybody knows about Winter's Bone is that it's called Winter's...BONE. Hahaha.
Chances of Winning: 1/10

127 Hours (2010): Christian Colson, Danny Boyle, John Smithson

There's been some weird hype lately that this flick might pull down Best Original Song. I'll start citing this website which attempts to use some formulas to predict a flick's Awards Chances. Despite the heavy favourite Toy Story 3, it's possible this is the one category 127 Hours nabs. I don't personally believe it but at any rate none of the discussion is towards Best Picture or even Actor or Screenplay.
Chances of Winning: 2/10

The Kids Are All Right (2010): Gary Gilbert, Jeffrey Levy-Hinte, Celine Rattray

It's starting to look as though this film may walk away completely empty handed although it's gaining the most ground in the Original Screenplay Category which I predicted earlier. Actually as you can see, it's just the only non-The King's Speech script that might win according to these people. If that film sweeps though, it's likely it will also grab one for writing. Other than that, Annette still has a slim chance of upsetting Natalie but there isn't a whole lot behind this film right now for Best Picture. Chaulk it up to no one caring about a gay movie not nearly as controversial as Brokeback Mountain (2005).
Chances of Winning: 3/10

Toy Story 3 (2010): Darla K. Anderson

I still want to see Pixar grab this in my lifetime. Actually I'd be psyched to see any Animated Film grab this award sometime, as well as any Director Nomination from an Animated Film. Despite its buzz among people who may have only seen this among the Best Picture Nominees (millions of people. Actually that joke almost doesn't work this year, who the hell knew Black Swan and The King's Speech could be $100 million movies). It's also possible this film has a pretty slow night, possibly only picking up Best Animated Feature. Then again, when I see it parodied and torn down so well by The Simpsons this weekend I don't feel as bad.
Chances of Winning: 4/10

True Grit (2010): Ethan Coen, Joel Coen, Scott Rudin

There are plenty of pundits and math out there that actually favour this film in a few categories tho I don't really buy it. Eight time nominee Roger Deakins seems most likely to grab a statue for his Cinematography, but math gives the flick a fair shot in a few other categories that it definitely won't win (like Sound Mixing, c'mon). Anyway, the Academy just recognised one of the best Coen Films with tons of statues three years ago and it seems like their nominations have been granted ever since. True Grit is an excellent film but not as outstandingly shockingly good as No Country for Old Men (2007). Then again, that flick won in a very competitive year and True Grit's momentum seems to be rolling rather than slowing. I still don't think it's possible.
Chances of Winning: 5/10

Black Swan (2010): Mike Medavoy, Brian Oliver, Scott Franklin

This flick peaked a bit early and its Supporting Actor snubs of Mila Kunis, Barbara Hershey and Vincent Cassel seems to indicate the Academy didn't throw itself completely behind it. Then again, I'm saying all this when Natalie is an absolute lock for Best Actress. While it may have done a bit better a few weeks ago I think Swan Fever has passed and we aren't seeing this as often the week that ballots are due.
Chances of Winning: 6/10

The Fighter (2010): David Hoberman, Todd Lieberman, Mark Wahlberg

It's unlikely that Mark's Opus wins more than the Supporting Acting Categories but Boxing Films have been involved in one of the most famous Academy upsets and snubs, so who knows. I place The Fighter ahead of Rocky (1976) but far behind Raging Bull (1980) in terms of quality, but we all know at this point that that doesn't really matter. As soon as all these films are released it's all politics, quality means a bit less. I think Mark's been underrated as both an actor (Wait...what?) but he's certainly underrated as a Producer. That being, he doesn't win here.
Chances of Winning: 7/10

Inception (2010): Christopher Nolan, Emma Thomas

I think Inception could roll farther than some people think. While its considered a virtual lock in both Sound Categories and Visual Effects, it wouldn't be a stretch at all for it to nab Art Direction, Cinematography and Original Score, and at that point is it that outrageous that it also takes Best Picture? It would certainly be a huge upset tho its entirely possible (and true) that Nolan really made a very technically proficient film that doesn't have a whole lot of "artful" parts such as acting, directing or is really the kind of film the Academy adores. In fact, there is this growing idea that Hollywood hates what Inception represents - a very successful uniquely original idea, as insane (or not) as that may seem. From this perspective I'd call it equally likely Inception walks away with nothing. What's hardest to say is that out of all the Best Picture Nominees Inception is about guaranteed the greatest Legacy. Good original action blockbusters like this are so incredibly rare these days. It won't find honor here.
Chances of Winning: 8/10

The Social Network (2010): Scott Rudin, Dana Brunetti, Michael De Luca, Ceán Chaffin

Now, a few weeks ago I probably would have flip-flopped my top two. Most of the Academy voters likely feel the same way, but The King's Speech is peaking at the exact right moment, when most voters submit their ballots at the deadline. While some like Peter Travers are desperately still campaigning for The Social Network, Roger Ebert has some good reasons to think that The King's Speech is the one. Math also decrees that the Facebook Movie will win (tho for some reason that escapes me the author decided not to factor in DGA wins, which is a huge deal. As anyone can see when you factor in these Awards the race becomes substantially closer). Remember when all we knew about The Social Network was that it was some kind of Facebook: The Movie! and it sounded ridiculously stupid? Now on the verge of Best Picture of the Year. Wow. It's tough to say, The Social Network has been riding a huge string of wins all year and if we were being conservative I'd still pick it to take home the whole thing Sunday Night.
Chances of Winning: 9/10

The King's Speech (2010): Iain Canning, Emile Sherman, Gareth Unwin

Luckily no one around here is conservative. The King's Speech is hot baby. It's the hottest flick, still scoring at the theaters, this film had ridiculous legs on its way to its current $104 million total.If I were submitting my ballot right now I'd be writing this one down as my number one, which is what I based a lot of this prediction on. The Academy all comes down to the right combination of momentum, politics and timing. Only when everything lines up does a film walk away with the Best Picture Award. Of course, I was a bit too cynical last year and blew this and most other predictions because I thought AVABAR (2009) would sweep but it turned into The Hurt Locker's (2009) sweep. When I made my predictions last month I again leaned more towards a sweep by The Social Network, which may bite me in the ass. Ugh I predicted a Black Swan / Inception battle over Cinematography? This is looking rough already. Now the only thing left to do is sit back and watch.
Chances of Winning: 10/10

First Impressions: The King's Speech

I love a good double-feature courtesy of lax movie security and a carefully timed bathroom visit. This is how I caught both The Fighter (2010) and The King's Speech (2010) this past Saturday Afternoon. Now you can check out my review of Mark's Opus here but today we're looking at what could very well be the Best Picture of the Year. Let's dive right in amidst the spoilers and mostly laughing at the swears:

The swears in this movie rule. The strings of proper Kingly English Profanity from time to time are consistently amusing and the only reason for this film to ever receive a rating stronger than PG. Now that we've got that giggling out of the way, maybe we can actually analyze this beast.

The King's Speech is a very British Movie. There's no questioning how it swept most of the BAFTAs. It's a tough look at both the role of the Monarchy in modern times as well as its relation to the common people. The cast also features some of the best actors across the realm, most of who have appeared in Harry Potter flicks at some point. We've got Dumbledore as King George V playing an excellent scary strict authority figure and later an equally excellent cat dying from Alzheimer's. Peter Pettigrew is actually pretty prestigious as Winston Churchill, who plays a small but vital role supporting the eponymous stutterer. Finally Bellatrix Lestrange plays Elizabeth, Duchess of York and later the queen. I wouldn't call her exceptional but that's only because she's very grounded. She plays her role subtly and it's refreshing to see how supportive and loving she is of her hubby's small yet significant vocal fallacy.

The cast keeps going from there. Guy Pearce shows up as Edward, Prince of Wales, the Duke's older, idler brother who eventually runs off to America to marry his twice-divorced mistress. Scandal! Finally the film really centers on the dynamic between an Australian import, Lionel Logue (Geoffrey Rush) and the Duke of York himself, King George VI otherwise known as Bertie. Yay. Colin Firth is a lock for the Academy Award for his portrayal of Bertie and Rush may not be far behind though Christan Bale really has all he needs to win. So what makes Firth so great? It's tied very closely to the driving idea of the film, which is the very high importance of appearance.

When you first hear the premise of this film it seems kind of doofy. The poor King can't speak well, boo-hoo. There's a lot more to it than that though. The film demonstrates the Monarchy's unflinching stress towards appearing perfect to its subjects. Everything is formal and ritualised. As Bertie comments from his youth, he was forced to switch from his natural left to right hand, wear splits to correct his knob knees and naturally degraded into speaking properly (the latter didn't really catch somehow). The mere fact that the King requires something as trivial as Speech Therapy requires the ultimate discretion from those involved. It's that British sensibility at work. Society frowns upon grandiose emotional displays (even at a Father's deathbed) and Decorum prevails over all. By all means the people's view of the Royal Family is of utmost importance.

For this reason Edward VIII must abdicate after he falls in love with a Double-Divorcée American. This kind of thing may not be a huge deal in the States but the Monarchical Tradition abhors it, which leads to Bertie's ascension to the Throne. While a Speech Impediment is not grounds for abdication it certainly isn't a great feature for a Head of State whose role is mostly symbolic. Instead of inspiring his people Bertie has more often than not been pushed aside as a withering idiot who can't even speak.

As World War II approaches, the stakes rise. The stammering is a sign of low confidence. On the verge of another Great War the people needed their King to be strong. Bertie is actually impeccably strong but his inability to express himself holds him back despite his hard work, loyalty to country and wide knowledge of law and governance. Thus there is this continued stressed importance on something that people may not think of as that important. As the film progresses it's clear that the vocal challenge is both extremely difficult to overcome (partly due to a steady self-fulfilling prophecy) and extremely important to overcome. Thus as the Monarchy has always stressed appearance over anything else, it's clear that their inspirational and symbolic role is actually derived from appearance.

The film's narrative was somewhat similar to The Fighter in that the protagonist couldn't really pull off what he desperately needed to achieve until the climax. Micky Ward wins a legitimate championship and earns the Pride of Lowell. George VI delivers a speech on the Eve of War that inspires his people to remain standing against the Nazis. In both films this is after some extended frustrating sequences of the characters failing continuously.

Now I've barely talked about the relationship between Bertie and Lionel which makes up the majority of the film. Again, it's all about appearance. Lionel is no Doctor, something he only allows the King to believe. The difference in social status as well as Lionel's Australian Origins create some tension between him and Bertie (as well as others such as the Producers of the play Lionel auditions for). There's almost a bit of MPDG at work here actually. The characters are very clear cut and play off each other organically while continually dealing with immense pressure from outside forces such as the succession of Monarchs, family scandal and ultimately World War II.

It's a film that plays interestingly as a bit of underknown history (tho certainly more liberties were taken then with The Fighter but I don't have a problem with this at all when it furthers the effect of the narrative), displays incredible characters and acting, features impeccable Writing, Editing AND Sound Mixing. I believe it'll go toe to toe with any film in any of its twelve nominations except its Supporting Actors. Maybe not Cinematography either. It's close to both a technically, thematically and artistically perfect movie. It's also at times very funny.

With all this praise however, I actually find myself thinking about how its Legacy may develop. Will The Social Network (2010) and The King's Speech be like Ordinary People vs. Raging Bull (1980)? Terms of Endearment vs. The Right Stuff (1983)? Fuck tits, how about Dances with Wolves vs. Goodfellas (1990)? I'm not saying either film can really be snubbed because they're both exceptional, but whenever Goodfellas is on TV I stop everything else. That doesn't happen for Costner unless I've just seen AVABAR (2009) and want to compare notes. There is a lasting effect that some flicks have that I'm not sure The King's Speech possesses.

All we can do is wait I suppose. February 27 for starters.

First Impressions: The Fighter

I finally got a chance to catch this flick, which is exciting. I almost enjoy not seeing Best Picture Nominees until after I make tons of predictions. At the Academy Award level all films are pretty deserving, it really comes down to timing and politics. More on that later this week in our final installment of the Oscar Zone Vol. II before the ceremony.

Anyway, this is a fantastic film. I don't know what it is about Boxing Movies and Gangster Movies, it seems like it's tough to make a poor one. The Fighter (2010) features an incredible cast, a classic underdog story as well as a unique family drama. It's assuredly an actor's movie so let's dive in (some spoilers abound):

Both Melissa Leo and Amy Adams have been nominated for the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress for their roles as Micky Ward (Mark Wahlberg)'s mother and squeeze respectively. They both play very hard-headed strong women characters that are surprisingly good. Amy Adams hasn't had that high of a pedigree to her career so far but her turn here is excellent. She appears very natural as a college drop-out with some deferred dreams. Melissa Leo, the probable forerunner for the Oscar plays an excellent domineering mother. She treads that line between smothering and supporting her son very well.

The key to this film lies with the family dynamic. The characters bounce off each other spectacularly. Christian Bale as Dicky Eklund is spectacular. He gets into this character like he has always tried in his career but rarely succeeded on this level. His intense method acting is paying off for him. The key to all these crazy characters in the film tho is Wahlberg. As Bale characterised him at the Golden Globes, he plays the stoic character that really ties the rest of the film together. He's the center which makes it more difficult to judge how good his acting is. While his delivery seems flat it's part of the soft-spoken but solid character of Micky Ward. While everyone else around him goes nuts, it's his solidarity that ultimately keeps them all together. Micky's got a good enough heart that his mother, half-brother, father and girlfriend are willing (after a good amount of tension and a few thrown punches) to ultimately come together for that one big chance.

That's the key to this film. It's what distinguishes it from other boxing films. While we could probably compare Ward's character to Stallone's Rocky (tho he's much less awkward and appears as soft-spoken but more confident) and the insane family to Raging Bull (1980), it ultimately pulls in another direction which saves the film from being a simple retread. There is of course a lot more going on here.

An understated but important theme here is hometown pride. The family doesn't live in a great neighborhood in not a great town. Micky is riding the pride and limited prestige his older brother Dicky once gave to Lowell, MA for a brief moment when he knocked down Sugar Ray Leonard (he might have tripped). At its heart the film is about Dicky accepting his fate as a has-been and finally stepping aside so that his brother may have a genuine shot. The same is true for the arc of their mother, who had favoured Dicky. He can't get over his own problems or ego for so long, it's not until jail when he's separated from Micky does Micky realise what he can accomplish without him (Tho he still takes Dicky's advise from prison. As unreliable as Dicky is, when he's on his game he knows what he's talking about). How can Micky preserve his important family dynamic while supporting his own dreams?

It's a tough call between a family who Micky loves yet is clearly holding him back and the opportunity to do something truly great. When he meets Charlene (Amy Adams the MTV Girl), someone close to him who encourages him in a more intelligent path to the top, he's ready to listen. This splintering of trust and loyalty to family and success drives the film. Micky, heart as big as he is though, understands that he won't be successful without everybody's help and he's strong enough for Dicky to finally curb his ego and apologize to Charlene, getting her back to his brother. With all this the stakes also begin to rise after Dicky's crack-addled HBO Special really destroys the Pride of Lowell. Micky needs to win not only for his own dreams but restore honour to his family and his town. He does. Yay.

Lastly, this movie is pretty sweet by how true it really is. The real-life Micky and Dicky are shown over the credits and in just a few seconds we realise how good Mark and Christian have been. Virtually all of the sets were real Lowell sets, some of which were actually the same gyms where the real Micky trained. They even used the same HBO Commentary and Directors for the fights. It's incredible. Even Mickey O'Keefe, Wahlberg's police chief trainer in the film was...the actual Mickey O'Keefe who trained Ward. I was pretty surprised at that one, O'Keefe had not had any previous acting experience, I'd call him flawless. Mark also trained intensely for this role, close to four years in between his other films he was waking up early and putting in the hours. The transparency of this film deserves some high praise.

I also love the comparisons to The Simpsons boxing episode "The Homer They Fall" (S8;E3). Naturally parodying other boxing films (mostly just Raging Bull), it's also and includes pastiches of real-life boxing icons like Don King and Mike Tyson. Anyway, Moe's major strategy to train Homer into a Champion Fighter is to stand take blow after blow until his opponents tire out at which point he'll nudge them over. Micky does just about the exact same thing during his fight with Alfonso Sanchez. I mean, he might have punched a bit harder but his strategy (tho maybe not on purpose) is almost the same as Homer Simpson.

So the characters and acting are excellent, the story couldn't be more true to life and the family dynamic is complex and interesting. Will it win Best Picture? No, because of the flick I saw in the theaters about 15 minutes after which I'll give some impressions of tomorrow.

Oscar Zone Vol. II; Part IV: Directing!

I'm actually excited that I timed this post after the BAFTAs. The big directorial upset (at least comparatively) has secured some confidence in my own predictions. The Directing Oscar is rarely distinct from the Best Picture Award; so much credit to the performance of a film rests on the Director's shoulders. I would not be surprised if the awards split this year though, more on that in a bit. For now let's start examining a slew of Directors Who Aren't Chris Nolan:

Best Achievement in Directing

David O. Russell for The Fighter (2010)
Russell did a pretty fair job on this one, but let's face it, he got in over Nolan by the skin of his britches. The Fighter is more of an actor's movie and Russell doesn't have nearly the momentum his cast does coming into this one. The story from a directorial standpoint isn't necessarily that challenging or innovative. I'd call something like Ron Howard's directing of Cinderella Man (2005) a bit more distinctive and interesting for similar subject matter.
Chances of Winning: 1/5

Ethan Coen, Joel Coen for True Grit (2010)
The Academy apparently loves nutting over the Coen Bros (I do too) but this isn't their year. They haven't really had a dent in any other major Award Show (in fact most have ignored it entirely) and True Grit has none of the momentum or prestige No Country for Old Men (2007) or even Fargo (1996) carried. Not to say that it's completely bereft of praise but people have noticed it far more for acting (and cinematography, actually) and I'd still love a Costume Prize for it. As for Directing, the Coens just didn't launch themselves high enough this time around.
Chances of Winning: 2/5

Darren Aronofsky for Black Swan (2010)
Aronofsky deserves one of these some day. He's young enough to grow that rapist stache a bit more thick though. He has admitted that he's possibly too intense for really popular appeal, but that shouldn't really stop and Academy that has awarded both bloody crime drama The Departed (2006) and nihilistic paradise No Country Best Picture in recent years. Neither of these films contain the emotional intensity of an Aronofsky film though, which may hold him back. He's certainly an actor's director though, which should start bankrolling his Awards Career. While Mickey won just about everything but an Academy Award for The Wrestler (2008) and Natalie is about to wrap this one up.
Chances of Winning: 3/5

Tom Hooper for The King's Speech (2010)
After Tom's DGA win I was beginning to seriously question my pick of Fincher for this category. After losing the BAFTA in his own country though, there's no way Tom locks this up across the pond. The race between these two flicks is really heating up though, and the Best Director Category will be a fantastic battle ground.
Chances of Winning: 4/5

David Fincher for The Social Network (2010)
The only thing that made me doubt Fincher's lock was Hooper's DGA nab but I'd contend Fincher pulls through here even if The Social Network is losing some hype in other areas. In fact, I'd consider as of now the only lock for the flick really is Editing. Congratulations. That said, Fincher is still my pick here. Politics and trends aside, the direction is excellent. Fincher is able to make computer typing and programming not only interesting but thrilling. Same with stuffy court hearings. His career and critical status reminds me a lot like Aronofsky actually. They're both part of this new generation of spectacular directors with a good number of cult hits and not many Awards to show for it yet. While they've both been nominated and deserving there's always been someone better, at least until this year. Actually all of the Directing Nominees this year are relatively young, the oldest and most established are actually the Coen Bros at 53 (Ethan) and 56 (Joel) respectively. Anyway, Aronofsky waits, this is Fincher's year.
Chances of Winning: 5/5

War of the Months: February

Well it's the Third Thursday of the Month, you know what that means! Part of 2011's on-going examination of the greatest films of each and every month, today we're taking a long hard look at the Chilly Month of Love and Groundhogs, February.

February: Month of Love and Horror

There are a lot of bad movies that come out in February. Not nearly as many as January, but it's still a pretty rough dumping ground. It actually has its share of surprisingly decent ones (more on that later), but for the most part it's still Hollywood Hangover. It's the month to make a quick buck. There are typically tons of Romantic Comedies and Cheap Horror Films both designed to get kids in the sack around Valentine's Day. There also tends to be tons of modern blaxploitation films, possibly either from the shared heritage of crappy Comedies or maybe it's just Black History Month.

February and March are typically months when Hollywood is gearing up heavily for Awards. It's almost as if the studios concentrate more on the great films that came out at the end of the past year than films released contemporaneously. This happens more in January and February, with March showcasing its share of Blockbusters as late, but still wholly aberrant of quality film-making.

Box Office Returns - The Passion and Superheroes

Go look at some lists from the Biggest February Weekend Openings. You'll see that The Passion of the Christ (2004) has the #1 spot by a wide margin. This is pretty atypical for a February Release, it simply coincided with the first week of Lent that year. After in the Top Ten that you'll see everything I was describing above. Horror (#2 Hannibal [2001], #8 Friday the 13th [2009]), Romance (#3 Valentine's Day [2010], #5 Hitch [2005], #10 50 First Dates [2004]), Black Comedies (#7 Tyler Perry's Madea Goes to Jail [2009]) and some Superhero Crap (#4 Ghost Rider [2007], #9 Daredevil [2003]). That leaves #6 Shutter Island (2010) as a strange outlier in both quality and box office for February.

If we're keeping track, January's Greatest Month ever was 2010 mostly fueled by the legs of AVABAR (2009). That stood at just a creep over a billion clams (I should write like this all the time). February's Greatest Month Ever is a bit short of that, only $769 Million, which isn't that much higher than the typical January (including this year's). Also like January February has become more popular recently. 2009 was fueled by a handful of decent successes including Coraline, He's Just Not That Into You and the aforementioned Friday the 13th and Madea Goes to Jail. It also always gets a little boost from Oscar Nominees that receive an extended run and interest around this time. See? Flicks from 2008 were particularly strong in this regard (Only 2007 and 2004 nominees have received a higher percentage boost in the past twenty years). This was because most 2008 nominees were small films that no one had seen. Slumdog Millionaire (2008) gained 2,329 theaters and $96.6 million total after its nomination (68% of its Total Gross). So you can start to see where the money is coming from. Not to say it's any huge amount (of all months, only April, September and October are lower), but that's that.

Best Films Ever Released in February:

Now, as I was saying earlier, February has the occasional strange gem among the usual trash. Even one Best Picture Winner from recent memory. It's also interesting that in the mid-1990s we saw a spate of Classic Goofy Cult Comedies, all February Releases. Among these are Wayne's World (1992), Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994), Billy Madison (1995), Happy Gilmore (1996) and Black Sheep (1996). Since this streak there have been a spite of pretty decent comedies recently including Saving Silverman (2001), Eurotrip (2004) and Semi-Pro (2008). I actually find myself laughing with all these films tho I realise they won't be found on any other Best Of-List ever. February also naturally features Groundhog Day (1993), which is a fantastic flick, possibly one of Bill Murray's greatest movies where he's not hunting ghosts. I'll add three decent action flicks as honourable mentions, including Pitch Black (2000), Constantine (2005) and Push (2009). But now we'll get into the Top Ten Greatest Movies Ever Released in February:

#10: Be Kind Rewind (2008)
#9: Army of Darkness (1993)
#8: Super Troopers (2001)
#7: The Quick and the Dead (1995)
#6: Old School (2003)
#5: Office Space (1999)
#4: Shutter Island (2010)
#3: Groundhog Day (1993)
#2: Silence of the Lambs (1991)
#1: Taxi Driver (1976)

Before I forget, I don't want to leave out Norbit (2007), Eddie Murphy's fat suit opus. Oh wait...he did that before. Classic February.

So that's that then. Behold the Majesty of the Month of Love. And Snow. Stay tuned next month for our Blockbuster Preview Month, March.

The Obligatory Grammy Complaint Post

The 53rd Grammy Awards air tonight on CBS, so naturally I felt it appropriate to write up a quick post to complain about how terrible these awards are. The Grammys have long since abandoned any recognition of talent in music and instead appeal to mass popularity. It might as well be the Teen Choice Awards.

Not to contradict myself, but some of this year's nominees are actually decent. They're mostly decent in a way that a site like Norwegian Morning Wood would recognize though, not necessarily deserving of the Highest Musical Praise possible. Yeah I dished out lots of love for "Nothin' on You" by B.o.B and Bruno Mars, but Record of the Year?

Hence the major Grammy problem. They don't have any equivalent to the Oscars' The King's Speech (2010) or Winter's Bone (2010). There's no small underdog Record or awesome song that no one's heard of that gains momentum. Every massively popular Summer Jam that has a small bit of critical credentials is somehow the best track of the year.

Now like I said I want to give some credit to a couple of these. I'd love to hear the presenters say "Fuck You" plenty of times honouring Cee Lo Green. Eminem's Recovery is actually an excellent and popular Album. For song of the year though I'm cheering for Ray LaMontagne's "Beg Steal or Borrow," an excellent modern folk rock song. That's the kind of nominee that this Award Show needs more of, the true recognition of quality across music rather than grabbing for ratings and attention through riding the back of Popular Artists. In its way, Music is still much smaller than movies. The Academy Awards can still bank on prestige and get away with something like Slumdog Millionaire (2008) or The Hurt Locker (2009) running away with the night. Ironically, tho it is much easier to access and listen to smaller music acts (thus guaranteeing that little-known nominees could get much more exposure prior to awards night), the Grammy Awards tend to ignore this aspect.

So basically who the hell cares about the Grammys. They're a perfect sell-out Award Show for CBS. Actually it's cool to see what channel gets what shows. CBS is of course the most popular, broad Network, perfect for the Grammy Awards. ABC is the last really prestigious, classy Network, of course they show the Oscars. The Golden Globes are a self-important but outwardly meaningless Award Show, natural for NBC. Since NBC is the only station that cares about winning Emmys they fit there as well. Finally, Fox has...um...the Teen Choice Awards. Yeah, that fits.

Comes on at 8:00 pm EST tonight. Be there, baby. I'll probably be watching The Godfather Part II (1974) on AMC.

Oscar Zone Vol. II; Part III: Writing!

As we keep moving closer to the biggest Movie Night of the year, the Oscar Ceremony February 27 (8:00 pm EST on ABC) we must prepare a few things. First we need to prep our eyes and ears for four hours of self-indulgent congratulations as well as the best-looking Corporate Synergy you'll see this year (Imagine Christina Hendricks' diamonds! Also watch Mad Men). We've also got to needle into every possible scenario and determine exactly who is going to bring home statue. Because what's the fun in a surprise? After going over the least important category last week (Acting, clearly), we move on to something slightly more less important: Screenwriting.

Best Writing, Screenplay Written Directly for the Screen

Another Year (2010) by Mike Leigh
Anyone heard of this one? I haven't, which means it's probably a good script that has no following and no momentum going into the Academy Awards. This is the easy one to write off and narrow the option down to the remaining four nominees.
Chances of Winning: 1/5

The Fighter (2010): Scott Silver, Paul Tamasy, Eric Johnson, Keith Dorrington
I have no doubts that The Fighter may sweep much of the Supporting Acting Nominations, but it's not dynamic enough of a screenplay to earn a Golden Boy here. A Sports Drama hasn't won here since Chariots of Fire (1981) and that flick had enough cajones to pull Best Picture, too. Screenplay tends to be a really quirky category, The Fighter is just way to typical to pull the upset.
Chances of Winning: 2/5

The King's Speech (2010): David Seidler
I would not be surprised if I'm way off and The King's Speech goes on a mad dash and sweeps most of its Awards. Slumdog Millionaire (2008) and The Hurt Locker (2009) both pulled off effective sweeps which included their writing categories and since The King's Speech's main competition (The Social Network) is in the Adapted slot, it would appear and open invite for Seidler to score here. What is interesting this year is that there isn't an obvious favourite for Best Picture so a sweep is more difficult to predict.
Chances of Winning: 3/5

The Kids Are All Right (2010): Lisa Cholodenko, Stuart Blumberg
There was this good streak in the later half of the past decade of tons of flicks just like this one nabbing Original Screenplay. The Academy seemed to love small, quirky indie, super-liberal stuff like Little Miss Sunshine (2006), Juno (2007) and Milk (2008). I picked this in my original bet to win, as of now I'm almost torn over its chances despite some recent history (And of course The Hurt Locker's win last year, tho that was still a small film). As of now, there's not a whole lot of momentum or hype over this Screenplay, tho both Milk and The Hurt Locker were decent surprises.
Chances of Winning: 4/5

Inception (2010): Christopher Nolan
I would call this nearly sealed up by now. Fresh of a WGA win, the Academy should apologize to Chris for snubbing him in the Director's spot (despite all his achievements, he only has a single Golden Globe nomination for Best Director to his name, also for Inception). He's been nominated before for Memento (2000), and he similarly handled the nuances of this screenplay with great talent. Of course, I thought the Academy would similarly award Tarantino last year the same way for Inglourious Basterds (2009) but I was off on that. Hopefully the WGA win pushes Inception in the right direction. Actually I do really believe the Academy has to find some way to honour a truly great Original Summer Blockbuster Idea that also made a ton of money. With this Summer already appearing to be ridiculous with its franchise overload, Inception was the one major brilliant highlight of 'Summer '010 and it was damn good.
Chances of Winning: 5/5

Best Writing, Screenplay Based on Material Previously Produced or Published

127 Hours (2010): Danny Boyle, Simon Beaufoy
Danny and Simon just snagged a statue for Slumdog a few years back but they won't repeat. 127 Hours is an interesting concept but the Screenplay isn't that exciting even with its gimmick film premise. It's much less interesting beat by beat than in a hot pitch room. In general it seems as though Critics and Academies have given this film the kind of standard Awards Love it deserves from the type of film it is, but the big prizes are reserved for some other seats come Oscar Night.
Chances of Winning: 1/5

Winter's Bone (2010): Debra Granik, Anne Rosellini
Winter's Bone! Winter's Bone! Winter's Bone! I'm going to just latch on to that joke.
Chances of Winning: 2/5

True Grit (2010): Joel Coen, Ethan Coen
This is kind of like last year, isn't it? Actually it's a trend every year. You've got the Coen Film, the Pixar Film, the Film no one's heard of, then the Serious Contender. I always have to give the Coens some love because they write their dialogue so crisply and their actors just eat it up. With True Grit however, there really weren't a whole lot of changes from the original 1969 film, nor even the original Charles Portis novel. Do they deserve an award anyway for still making the screenplay into an interesting, fresh and very cool movie? Possibly. that's why they're number three today.
Chances of Winning: 3/5

Toy Story 3 (2010): Michael Arndt, John Lasseter, Andrew Stanton, Lee Unkrich
As I just mentioned, we're pretty deep in a little trend of Pixar releasing incredible films with spectacular screenplays. How long until they're recognized? It's not going to be Cars 2 (2011). They can rack up all the Best Animated Feature Awards we'll give them but at some point we have to start noticing that these are flicks that can stand on their legs against anything else in Hollywood. That said, an animated film won't win Best Adapted Screenplay this year. This is a shame because Animated Screenplays must contain a lot more information than normal films. Every direction needs to be put on screen. Actually in part that's the Director's job. I don't see an Animation Director winning against a live action one any time soon either. It's just too different an animal.
Chances of Winning: 4/5

The Social Network (2010): Aaron Sorkin
There's not a chance in hell The Social Network loses this. From its premiere the greatest facets people touted for this film were is Trent Reznor score and the incredible Aaron Sorkin dialogue. The first scene is beautiful. It puts every thing on display, the instant characterization, the clever wordplay and the inciting incident for the entire sequence of events that follows. It's probably one of the best-written films I've seen in years and it should win next year's award, too. Full of iconic lines and brilliant set-ups, blow-aparts and interesting scenes and characters, this is awesome. While The King's Speech may have trouble in its category, The Social Network is the kind of film that rules Original Screenplay. In the past decade 5/7 Best Picture Winners have also won Best Adapted Screenplay (The other three Best Picture Winners, 2/3 won Best Original. The losers, respectively have been Chicago [2003], Million Dollar Baby [2004] and Gladiator [2000]. None of these films were considered frontrunners for Best Picture [maybe Gladiator] and none of them have been thought of highly since [maybe Gladiator]). What I'm saying is that if The Social Network gets its Screenplay win I think it'll secure Best Picture.
Chances of Winning: 5/5

Stay tuned, dear readers, next week we'll take a juicy look at the Best Director Nominations!

Because it was on TV: The Rise of F/X

F/X has the movies. They really do, actually. There has been no other channel rising through the ranks of Most Flipped To like F/X the past couple years. They've achieved this through a very adept business plan, somehow unique in the world of cable. There are tons of F/X-like channels out there. I'm talking about the Cable Channels that only play syndicated repeats of old TV shows, movies and typically crappy original programming. How does F/X rise above the ranks of USA, TBS and TNT? Because they're awesome in each of these aspects.

The Best in TV Reruns:

See, F/X has this very simple knack of just seeking out whatever's really popular and broadcasting it constantly. Its programming schedule continually shifts to accommodate the most popular tastes possible. While TNT and USA split hundreds of ubiquitous Law & Order, Bones and NCIS episodes, F/X recently picked up Two and a Half Men and currently plays it constantly. This in addition to decent older shit like Spin City and That 70s Show. The network is really just following the most basic numbers. Two and a Half Men is one of the highest rated TV shows of the past few years, and it also performs fantastic in syndication. In fact it's the highest-rated scripted show. F/X just jumps on the pony.

The Best in Original TV:

F/X originated as this repeats-only channel. Around the turn of the century it began creating Original Programming though, and they've only gone up from there. Starting with The Shield and Nip/Tuck, F/X actually developed a very high standard for its Original Programming. Its shows are consistently excellent, from Sons of Anarchy to Justified and Rescue Me. The channel in general has been consistently snuffed by most major award shows, notably the Emmys. The shows are fantastic though. Unlike quirky cute USA shows or Tyler Perry TBS Comedies, F/X is full of near-HBO level programming. It's a slight notch below AMC's prestigious programs. They still tend to be renegades, shows that fly by their underrated pants. Sometimes they're too under the radar (Terriers), others are heavily hyped but middling (Lights Out).

What also sets F/X apart from other stations is their equal knack for Comedy as well as Drama. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia remains one of the funniest shows on television and is already a huge cult hit. I personally hate The League, but it seems to work for other people, and Louie is the darker spiritual successor to Seinfeld if there ever was one. F/X has done an excellent job spending its money. They built themselves up through the success of other programs and movies then invest in their own Original Content, always with very high standards. They really aren't content with the broad dramas of TNT or the bland comedy of TBS. They've found a very unique niche and have so far been successful.

The Best in Movies on TV:

Now this is by far F/X's greatest selling point. F/X really does have the movies. Their aggressive acquisition of the most popular flicks as soon as they're available attracts the most viewership and interest. We're smack in the middle of every great hit of Summer 2008 (except The Dark Knight, which TNT snatched up). F/X has been assaulting the senses with Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk, Kung Fu Panda, Hancock, Wanted, Tropic Thunder and Step Brothers. It's an incredible line-up. At least from a popular standpoint. F/X is like that all the time. They're always on the cutting edge of Movies on TV. It's an art form for these guys.

F/X will be this way for some time to come. They had a widely reported deal for the rights to AVABAR (2009). They also plan on showing Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009) as well as the Twilight series. It's a complete money grab. They're also showing the coolest flicks of the last two years. It's the place to be, baby. Not only that but they're increasing their prestige by recently acquiring The Social Network (2010) as well as Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps (2010). If you're a careful watcher of the network you may have caught fellow Best Picture Winner (maybe) The Departed (2006) play in between showings of Ghost Rider (2007) and Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007). This is fun actually, tracking recent Best Picture winners. You'll find No Country for Old Men (2007) on USA for some reason, Million Dollar Baby (2004) on AMC and Return of the King (2003) on TNT. Fun stuff. I know I've seen Crash (2005) somewhere, it's not often on TV though.

I have no idea if anyone else is interested in this stuff. I find it awesome and extremely interesting. Maybe I just watch too much TV, explicitly movies on TV. In an age of competing media outlets, declining DVD sales, Netflix and Chinese Pirated everything, I still watch flicks on television. On a lazy hungover Saturday everybody does. Who gets what films and how that reflects on a Channel's Reputation and Personality affects more lives than we take for granted.

Anywho, here's to a great 2012 showing of AVABAR!

Because it was on TV: The Case Against Glee

I don't often get a chance to watch the Teen Choice Award-winning FOX program known as Glee, but enough of a Packers high after the Big Game Sunday night drew me into one of the most terrible shows I've ever seen. This show is so ingratiatingly painful to watch, so frustrating and tepid that I could barely make it through a few minutes (I had a girl over. Also the only way I've gotten through my single episode of Grey's Anatomy). But like a good Pop Culture Rambler (I'm not bold enough to label this blog a Critic's Column) I did feel as though I shouldn't judge a show based on preconceptions, rumours or hearsay. I also don't feel like I should dismiss the program for the sole reason that it's not targeting my specific demographic. There's a fine line here though and I'm not taking excuses. I'm not the demographic for Josie and the Pussycats (2001) either but that movie ruled. It's time to really dig into what makes Glee so awful. If you take my hand on this journey, we can discover together.

Glee is probably the gayest show on television. Not that there's anything wrong with that. But the amount of homosexuality rampant in this show is ludicrous. Everyone is so gay! What kind of high school is this? It does a nice job in a sense shining some light on the plight of the homosexual community, but c'mon - High School Football players get sore because their teammates call them gay for joining Glee Club? Are they really joining Glee Club and not expecting their masculinity to take a hit? If Glee sought to challenge gender standards in an innovative and interesting way that would be one thing, but it seems to me as though the show makes a big deal over something that would very obviously happen and the characters are simply too prideful to deal with harassment effectively or coolly.

Let me peddle out of my corner here because I don't want to appear homophobic. The show just pounds you over the head with this stuff, and much of it is unjustified. There are always assholes in High School, but the characters in Glee just don't deal well with the abuse. It just seems as though all the Glee Club members have this undeserved sense of pride. None of them seem to be in on the ridiculous joke that the Starting Quarterback is also in fucking Glee Club. Instead of inspiring his teammates by rolling through the punches or laughing off the joke, he gets insanely defensive over his fellow Glee Clubbers, which creates further animosity in their High School dynamic rather than easily defusing tension. I can't believe they have that wheelchair kid play football. C'mon. You've got limitations, kid. You will never be this. Sorry.

The fact is that the show magnifies High School problems immensely. I'd rather watch a show like Freaks and Geeks that is more grounded in displaying some of the problems with being unpopular in High School. No one however, really hates the Glee Club because they're nerdy or pathetic. They hate them because they're fucking singing all day when other kids are studying their asses off to pass their Chemistry Exams. They're in everybody's face all the time. It's so irritating. It's also full of dumb sluts, really bitchy goody-two shoes and whatever the hell that is. None of these students are content with just going to class and staying quiet. They're always whining and singing and screaming for attention in everyone's face. What the hell. That's why no one likes you, go sing in the shower or car ashamedly like everyone else.

I also really dislike the format of this show. The songs seem to constantly just cover gaps in plot or fill time, which happens all the time in Musical Films or Shows, but in Glee they tend to be all Pop Songs. Their placement therefore, is really just to sell Popular Albums with little to no context with the actual storylines. The plot isn't advanced through song content, occasionally by tone, but the selections seem ridiculously arbitrary. Every now and then there's a Britney Spears Night or a Michael Jackson Night, what is this, American Idol? It's awful.

Now, you might think I've saved some love for the end, probably Jane Lynch. No way. She does a nice acting job but is far too maniacal to be really believable as a character. You can believe she's a national champion but her irrational hatred for Glee Club and every one else around her doesn't make any sense. No one is reasonable in this show. It's difficult to watch such tremendous egos bounce off each other all day without any retension. I mean, fuck, even the kids on Jersey Shore apologize to each other and make up their differences every now and then (still debating the reality of that show. Wait, no we shouldn't). The characters are cartoons.

So you can watch Glee tonight.8:00 EST. I won't be. I really can't stand this show, tho I wanted to give it a chance and then administer hopefully thoughtful criticism that would dissuade anyone else ever from watching it. I do wish there would be a good Gay Comedy Show on TV that can appeal across Sexuality Lines. Gay people need their Chappelle Show. But would watching it make us Gay? I think that's a lot of people's fear. No one's turning Black from watching Tyler Perry. But too much Glee...be careful, red-blooded America. What a ridiculous country. I still hate Glee.

First Impressions: The Mechanic

This is not a bad movie. It's an extreme distance away from being a good movie by any standard, but it's not too bad. The Mechanic (2011) is nothing but a very typical action/conspiracy bullshit roll in the hay. So let's dive in!

This is apparently actually a remake of a 1972 film by the same name starring Charles Bronson. I've never seen that one, my guess is that's also a very typical Bronson action film, one of dozens that comprised Bronson's career and persona. This is really no different besides swapping Bronson for Statham, who really has settled into a nice personality-free action career. Let's ramble on this topic for a tic actually - think about Bronson vs. Statham. Try to think of an impression of both. Who is more memorable or iconic? I mean, Jay's got the baldness and the taking-himself-too seriously aspects, but really he's too silent. Statham's acting is quiet without being angry. He plays these emotionally controlled, strong and silent type characters that just aren't that interesting. I mean, even Master Chief has a bit more personality than Statham.

So that's the guy running this film. I called this an action film tho the action is really very subdued. There aren't a whole lot of explosions until the last few moments and the first half is primarily shots of Statham brooding. None of it is all that interesting. The film trends that narrow line between mysterious origin and confusing lack of information. We never really find out what organisation Statham is working for, because supposedly it doesn't really matter, he just does his job. This is retarded. It's very difficult to judge the stakes and reasoning for much of his actions. He doesn't really have a problem killing his mentor Donald Sutherland (ridiculously phoning in a performance here) because he believes if he doesn't it will just be someone else to kill him. However, the consequences to him refusing the assignment can't be worse than his eventual resolution to kill everyone who hired him anyway. I mean, he kills them after learning they tricked him into killing Sutherland because Sutherland was trying to screw them over. They had no problem against Statham and didn't really treat him poorly or try to conspire against him. It's just really dumb.

Alright, now that we've got that angry rambling over plot and motivation out of the way we can dig into this film. The Mechanic is not the kind of flick that should hold plot as important. It takes itself so seriously though, and takes enough time to show brooding to attempt to establish the emotional state of its characters that when it can't pull off a satisfying sequence of events it detracts from the film. With something like this you've either got to go all the way nuts at this point (see all Nic Cage films) or put the time in for a more satisfyingly good movie (I think of something like The Shooter [2007] that did a nice job with a similar stoic-lead/conspiracy plot that gives a satisfying movie experience). Especially for a Statham movie, this needed to be goofier.

There's this other weird Boondock Saints (2000) kind of vibe of killing "only bad guys." I don't know why they pressed this so hard. Even when Statham and Ben Foster (the only enjoyable actor in this film) prepare to kill this famous Reverend, the film is careful to establish that he's more of a cult leader and also a rapist. Just so we're sure that the people sneaking in and killing a defenseless overweight man in his hotel room aren't morally ambiguous.

As for the action, there are some cool scenes, tho they're all pretty brief. Ben Foster is nearly raped and then kills some huge rival assassin for some reason, which is almost solely an excuse for a fight after he stupidly avoids what could have been an easy kill. The final kill-big-bad scene is also almost too easy, tho the motto of the movie seems to be Amat Victoria Curam, which is latin for "Victory Loves Preparation." There is actually less audacity to the scenario preparation than even a film like The Dark Knight (2008), but by its nature it makes the challenges of the protagonists less difficult and interesting.

So yeah, this film sucked. It doesn't have enough action to make up for its shortcomings and its plotting and characters just aren't that great. It's not necessarily a poorly constructed or shot film but there's just not that much here that's exceptional. A perfect installment for Jason Statham's already vigorous career.

The Long Halloween Vol. II: Super Bowl Sunday

Oh yeah! Now you may have been expecting Valentine's Day or even Groundhog Day, both of which have movies equally integral to our communal pop culture. But for this installment of our yearlong look at the greatest holiday TV Specials we turn to the greatest American Weekend of the year, Super Bowl Sunday.

This Sunday has become a de facto nationwide holiday, a day for beer guzzling, nacho-eating and possibly beating that one Patriots fan you hated but had to invite for some reason. The day is virtually known for its TV. As the crowning moment for the most popular sport in America, it's the last remaining must-see event for the population. In years past it's been the only program with the ability to challenge the highest Nielsons of all time (does that mean shit?) and because of that it's also the uh...Super Bowl of Advertising for the year.

So really it's the perfect Day to examine from a Pop Culture perspective. It's the greatest we'll ever share culture simultaneously. Whether you're watching to laugh or cringe at the commercials or to see the asshole you dropped the second week of Fantasy get a Championship Ring, The Big Game has something for everyone. Except Puppy Lovers, that's covered on another channel (Does that Puppy Bowl ref do anything else? Ah, no he doesn't. I still can't believe the Puppy Bowl exists and has a following, actually. It's gaining some good speed as one of Animal Planet's most anticipated programs actually. Can you imagine Mike Ditka's grandkids changing the channel to this from The Game? What a travesty. What a...such a cute travesty.) Anyway, The Super Bowl, regardless of outcome is the place to be tonight. It's a holiday that by its nature necessitates watching Television. It's every broadcaster's dream, truly the Super Bowl of Broadcasting.

We've had a string of excellent Super Bowls, too. From David Tyree's Catch to Harrison's Runback to the simple Rise of Who Dat? Nation, it's been pretty rewarding for NFL fans (and what's rewarding to the viewer is rewarding to advertisers, the Circle of Life continues. Rafiki-style). Will we see the first Rapist to win a Super Bowl this year? Or can Rodgers, Jennings, Woodson, Raji and Matthews bring some pain? Or will Budweiser have better commercials than Coke? As a TV and Football lover, this is it, baby.

There hasn't been a lot of good Super Bowl Films. Wouldn't a Super Bowl Trip make a great Road-Trip movie? Or a dangerously low Nacho Cheese Shortage make a compelling Domestic Drama? I think so. Anyway, while the Super Bowl is known as the lead-in to many good shows, there aren't a whole lot of good shows actually about the Big Game. I can think of one though, which is excellent: "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday" (S10;E12) from The Simpsons:



There are so many incredible moments in this episode. Fred Willard nails the sucker Wally Kogen ("...they [the tickets] seem to be printed on some sort of cracker"), of course named after Jay Kogen and Wallace Wodorsky. There's also a great send-up of Super Bowl Commercials ("The Catholic Church - we've made a few...changes"). Then there's Homer's Super Bowl Fantasy of touching Tom Landry's Wife's Leg. It's non-stop spectacular jokes.

It's also actually pretty accurate in regard to its football referencing. The obvious joke of dubbing-over the Broncos and Falcons playing (as well as Clinton still being president...and still being married to Hillary) is accurate for Super Bowl XXXIII as is the layout of Pro Player Stadium in Miami. Tho there wasn't a safety in Super Bowl XXXIII, the game did air on Fox for Billionaire Tyrant, Rupert Murdoch and John Madden and Pat Summerall commentated. Their angry comments at the finale of the episode is priceless ("Did it strike you as odd that in a Super Bowl show with Dolly Parton we didn't see any football or singing?") and the weird inclusion of Vincent Price is awesome ("Give it some gas, Grandpa!" "Oh, quiet, Jody, you're not helping!").

I also love how after Homer became the Owner of the Denver Broncos in 1996 (Given to him by Hank Scorpio in "You Only Move Twice" [S8;E2]), they became one of the better teams in the league. Prior to that episode, the Broncos had been 0-4 in Super Bowls, including one of the most lopsided Bowls Ever. The joke in "You Only Move Twice" is that the Broncos were a terrible team, having barely achieved .500 in the past two seasons. During the 1996 year though, they went 13 - 3 but lost the Divisional Playoffs to Jacksonville. Clearly when Homer was able to take control of the team in the off season he turned them around tho; they won Back-to-Back Super Bowls the years after Homer became Owner (See Also: George Costanza's tenure with the Yankees - he came in in 1994 in the middle of a 12-year play-off slump, they won The World Series in 1996).

Anyway, it's a Spectacular Day with a great episode here (The Simpsons have some other good Super Bowl Episodes [of course] as well as an inordinate amount of Football References throughout its years, but this one's the best). For food, you had better drink plenty of beer as well as your weight in Hamburgers and Nachos. After all, this is a True American Holiday, excessive consumption is the name of the game.

Go Packers.

Oscar Zone Vol. II; Part II: Acting!

Alright folks, time to kick this Oscar Coverage into high gear. This week we're going through all the Acting Nominations and ranking their chances at grabbing gold. This isn't a very competitive year for Acting so this ought to be short and sweet. Maybe. Let's start with a surefire hit:

Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role

John Hawkes for Winter's Bone (2010)
There's not a Penguin's Chance in Hell John comes home with this. It's an above average performance but Winter's Bone doesn't really have any momentum or enough esteem to warrant this kind of notice.
Chances of Winning: 1/5

Mark Ruffalo for The Kids Are All Right (2010)
Mark's a nice guy but I'm thinking more and more that this isn't the year for The Kids Are All Right. It's too unconventional and the star of this pic certainly wasn't Ruffalo. He doesn't really have the History of Awards love or is the calibre of actor this statue has gone to in years past.
Chances of Winning: 2/5

Jeremy Renner for The Town (2010)
I know last year was Bridge's to lose but I still think that Renner may have deserved it more. These tough gangster-type roles have become pretty common though lately and tho Renner shines here if Wahlberg couldn't get love playing a hard Bostonian, Renner certainly won't. With the popularity of the Boston Crime Sub-Drama seemingly peaking, it doesn't look like we'll see much of this kind of thing again.
Chances of Winning: 3/5

Geoffrey Rush for The King's Speech (2010)
Here's one that I wouldn't be surprised causes a big upset. Without The Social Network (2010) grabbing anything in the Supporting Categories, the love of The King's Speech could spill over here. But Rush really captures the screen and has a bit of History with the Academy already. Since Firth is a near guarantee in the Best Leading Actor Category, a win here for Geoff would be pretty huge. Really in a year without Bale's momentum I'd have to give it to him.
Chances of Winning: 4/5

Christian Bale for The Fighter (2010)
The Supporting Actor category has been dominated by intense Villainous Performances for years. It's not since 2006 that we've had a really surprising upset, and this year will be no different. There's no one on this list that captures attention like Bale and while young, his impressive body of work and ridiculous method acting will finally get some recognition. He's snatched just about every award he needs to on his way here, while apparently unemployed (or not), this is sure to fire up his career. Anyone think he'll get one for The Dark Knight Rises (2012)? No? Good.
Chances of Winning: 5/5

Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role

Hailee Steinfeld for True Grit (2010)
The Academy loved True Grit for some reason this year, tho it's been mostly ignored by other big awards shows. This was an auspicious start for Ms. Steinfeld but she doesn't really stand a chance among the other ladies present.
Chances of Winning: 1/5

Helena Bonham Carter for The King's Speech (2010)
I think Helena was the weak point of The King's Speech (like being the Punter of the 1985 Chicago Bears, though), but I wouldn't discount an upset. She's had plenty of high-profile roles over the years that haven't been recognised, possibly because she's highly overrated (just like her hubby).
Chances of Winning: 2/5

Jacki Weaver for Animal Kingdom (2010)
This is the bizarro performance of this list, but it might just be enough to push her over the edge. It would be a surprise win for sure and I know there's some pundits out there pushing for it. I don't believe Animal Kingdom has enough prestige though to really push this through.
Chances of Winning: 3/5

Amy Adams for The Fighter (2010)
Amy's had enough decent roles to build up to this, she's a babe and Hollywood loves honouring its little girls (at least it sure did in the past decade). Doesn't she fit in there perfectly? The performance itself is pretty decent but not enough to really seal the deal for me.
Chances of Winning: 4/5

Melissa Leo for The Fighter (2010)
I was debating this, but Melissa's SAG award was the final indicator for me that she'll probably head home with Oscar come the end of February. She rambled about the Union in her acceptance speech, probably gaining favour with the bum actors voting for her in addition to coming through with a very good performance. The Fighter sweeps the Supporting Awards with no love for Mark Wahlberg? That's cold, Academy.
Chances of Winning: 5/5

Best Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role

James Franco for 127 Hours (2010)
Will Jim present an award for himself?! Not a chance. James does a nice job carrying this film but it's really not captivating enough of a performance to bring home Oscar. He's also got far too many goofy roles to his name so far for the Academy to take the hotshot that seriously. Don't worry, he'll put out a James Dean biopic one of these years and get some more love. The rest of the field this year is actually pretty decent.
Chances of Winning: 1/5

Jesse Eisenberg for The Social Network (2010)
Another young buck, Jesse's performance was very special in this film, the first scene alone aptly demonstrates both his quickfire acting and capability to deliver Aaron Sorkin's writing as crisp and sharp as it's written. While The Social Network has gotten tons of love, Jesse hasn't (and he should - we forget he's so integral to its success because he slips that much into Zuckerberg) and won't pull anything Oscar Night.
Chances of Winning: 2/5

Jeff Bridges for True Grit (2010)
Is there a current acting Chameleon as adept as Jeff Bridges? He slips in and out of roles seamlessly, his two December pics, True Grit and TRON: Legacy (2010) should demonstrate that. It's possible Jeff repeats (out-Roostering John Wayne helps), and becomes the second actor to win an Oscar for playing the same character as a previous winner (See Also: Brando and De Niro winning both for Vito Corleone).
Chances of Winning: 3/5

Javier Bardem for Biutiful (2010)
Was No Country for Old Men (2007) Javier's warm-up? Will this be his last Oscar before he throws his career to the throes of Blockbusterdom? Who knows. The amount of nominations from this picture are surprising and many picked Wahlberg for this fifth slot. Javier is no stranger though and he slips into roles just about as good as Jeff.
Chances of Winning: 4/5

Colin Firth for The King's Speech (2010)
Yep. Not a chance Colin misses this. I knocked him earlier for mere mimicry but he adds some more depth here than visible at first. While The King's Speech may miss out on the Supporting Categories, Firth will bring back some prestige here (Actually their recognition as Best Cast at the SAGs may present otherwise). He's won everything he needs to and won't stop here.
Chances of Winning: 5/5

Best Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role

Jennifer Lawrence for Winter's Bone (2010)
Like John, Jennifer does not have the politics or momentum from Winter's Bone to make much of a dent here, nor is it strong enough a performance to turn many heads. Keep plugging along.
Chances of Winning: 1/5

Nicole Kidman for Rabbit Hole (2010)
What the hell is this movie? Anyway, it's been a while since Nicole's last win, when she actually played an interesting character well, but her Norbits* have been piling up insanely since then. There is so much evidence on display that she's a terrible actor, I find a win here highly unlikely.
Chances of Winning: 2/5

Michelle Williams for Blue Valentine (2010)
Kind of like Amy Adams, Michelle Williams is the kind of good, principled young actress the Academy loves. She already had a nomination for Brokeback Mountain (2005) and has only grown as an Actress since. Blue Valentine has been this maligned movie, snubbed in its rating by the MPAA (eventually reversed) and in just about every other category by the Academy. C'mon. It's not the kind of film that can win Best Picture but with ten nominations there should be some room (at least over 127 Hours). The film was scored by Grizzly Bear! Alright, I'm done
Chances of Winning: 3/5

Annette Bening for The Kids Are All Right (2010)
Annette is the kind of overlooked actress that the Academy could recognise Oscar Night. She's been nominated four times in the past twenty years with no Statue to show for it. She got some love from the Globes but placing The Kids Are All Right in the Comedy or Musical Category was just setting Annette up for the win. Like Mark though, the success of this film has been two quiet, especially when compared with the heat behind Black Swan, which was robbed off any Supporting Nominations.
Chances of Winning: 4/5

Natalie Portman for Black Swan (2010)
Like Colin and Christian, Natalie has won every major award on her road to the Oscars. She's also been a steady force in Hollywood for the past decade and has the brains and class to be a perfect Poster Girl for the Academy. She's perfect for her role in Black Swan, exhibiting equal parts innocence and malevolence that is really an acting Tour de Force. And she learns from Toulour! Anyway, this is Nats' award to lose this year.
Chances of Winning: 5/5

Tune in next week to watch Norwegian Morning Wood examine the Screenwriting Nominees!

*I'm starting to love the term Norbit, it's defined as such: An actor's terrible film released after his or her Prestige Picture that leaves such a horrid taste in everyone's mouth that that actor loses the Academy Award he or she was nominated for. See: Eddie Murphy in Dreamgirls (2006) vs. Norbit (2007).